No Longer a Victim

One of the ways an abuse survivor is kept crippled in their walk as a follower of Christ is in accepting a state of victimhood. This is something I have seen so clearly in my own life and the life of other victims is how victim mentality and self-pity can stunt any growth spiritually and often render the person powerless in their walk with Christ. A person in a victim mentality will never see their own sin, or at least not in any seriousness compared to the sins of others. I see this as one of the greatest hinderances to abiding in Christ and experiencing cleansing and forgiveness and victory. A person who sees their own sin as serious enough to damn them to hell and to need a savior willing to take on all the sin of the world- MY SIN- upon that cursed tree… this is a person who will see the love of God as shown in Christ Jesus. This is a person who will know they have been forgiven much. They will love much. They will be humble, dependent on God. One book I have found especially helpful is “The Wounded Heart” by Dan B. Allender. This book helped me immensely in that it revealed the sin the abuse victim will surely struggle with, and I found it very accurate. I found it so refreshing to focus not on the sin of the other party, but my own sin. Victimhood gives excuses for our actions- our own sin- because of the sin of others. Self-pity I have heard it said once, is demonic. C. S. Lewis put it this way: “The moment you have a self at all, there is a possibility of putting yourself first—wanting to be the center—wanting to be God, in fact. That was the sin of Satan: and that was the sin he taught the human race.” Another observation I have is victims and those indulging in self-pity love company. They stumble others as they themselves stumble. Our sin is never in a vacuum, it always affects others. This is not to say that it is wrong to grieve the evil done. I do believe there is a right sadness and grief over the abuse, and this is not the same as walking in self-pity. I for one do not want to walk as a victim anymore. Romans 8:37 “No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.” What a tragedy for those who were meant to embrace Christ who loved them and to walk as conquerors (because He has conquered!) to remain victims.